


Heartburn

by MissMoochy



Series: MissMoochy's Bad Things Happen Bingo Oneshots [12]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man/Deadpool - Joe Kelly (Comics)
Genre: Burns, During Canon, Gen, Spiderman/Deadpool - Joe Kelly (Comics) Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-21 22:13:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30028605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMoochy/pseuds/MissMoochy
Summary: Bad Things Happen Bingo prompt: [Burns]Wade knows he's losing his wife. She's cold and distant. And he's desperate to keep her. He does something stupid.
Relationships: Peter Parker & Wade Wilson, Shiklah/Wade Wilson
Series: MissMoochy's Bad Things Happen Bingo Oneshots [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1857715
Comments: 1
Kudos: 9





	Heartburn

**Author's Note:**

> In the Joe Kelly Spider-Man & Deadpool team-up comics, there was a storyline where Deadpool's skin healed. This happened because his mental health had improved due to his friendship with Spider-Man. Wade's wife, Shiklah, didn't like the fact he was changing so Wade burnt his face to appease her.

Love makes you do crazy things. Wade had thought love was through with him. Cupid had washed his tiny, cherubic hands of him. But apparently, Cupid wasn’t done, because he’d rammed a serrated arrow of love right up Wade’s ass. And now he was married. To the best evil, witchy, succubus gal in the galaxy.

Shiklah. A tall, statuesque woman, she dominated any room. She was beautiful, in the way that a diamond is beautiful. And yeah, the sex was red hot, Wade wasn’t complaining. He’d never dreamed that he’d find love, post-cancer. For years, his body had been the enemy to him. Six feet of ravaged skin, rough like leather and about as attractive as a cold sore. But Shiklah wasn’t like most girls. She was the Queen of Hell, a job that demanded a fair amount of attention, and she wouldn’t have her head turned by ordinary mortal men. But she saw something in Wade that she liked. Sometimes, lying in her chambers in Hell as the flames raged around them, he thought of a different body. Different skin lying beside him. Skin he’d only seen hints of. A hand here, the underside of a jaw. Spider-Man. That goody-two-shoes hero meant the world to Wade. He’d admired him for so long and now they were friends. He’d do anything for him, kill himself, kill others, scale every mountain, all that bullshit. Is that what love was? A complete desire to see your special person happy and safe?

But he’d screwed the pooch. Since his team-up with Spidey, he’d undergone a change. He’d questioned his previous morals, he’d had everything he knew turned on its head. Spider-Man was showing him a new way to live. And he wanted so badly to believe him. To trust him. He’d gladly grab Spider-Man’s hand and let himself be pulled into this new life. He already felt better. His soul felt cleansed. And his body had changed to reflect that. As if his mental state had an influence on the very skin that clung to him. Nowadays, when he gazed in the mirror, he saw clear skin. Not a scar in sight. It thrilled him. He’d never thought this was possible. And in any other circumstance, this would be a cause for celebration. But  _ she  _ didn’t like it.

* * *

So, he knew what he had to do. Sweat rolled his back, soaking his shirt. Hell was always hot. Go figure. And right here, he was standing over a stone bowl of hellfire. Flames flickered and spat as if the bowl was filled with some alien creature that wanted to escape. Sweat dripped from his forehead. Evaporated into nothing as it met the flames. Shiklah didn’t even look at him. She couldn’t bear seeing that perfect face.

“Babe? Babe, stay with me here. We’re gonna make it work.”   


He’d always been more of an action-orientated guy. That’s why he excelled in the military, that’s what made him such a good mercenary. Trust your instincts. Act immediately. Never hesitate.

He bent over and stuck his head in the bowl.

Agony. Instantaneous. He’d scream but his jaws locked together, his teeth grinding together in a pained frenzy. His skin split and tore, shrivelled in the searing heat. It was like falling in the sun, his skin could burst into nothing, disintegrate into dust. Some instinct inside him took the reins and he jerked back, out of the fire.

“Lockjaw’s Lepromatic Lug Nuts!” he yowled. Melting hunks of flesh slopped down his cheekbones and splattered in the fire below. 

Steam hissed on his bones, the smell of sizzling meat wafted through the air. His eyes rolled in their socks, no longer held in place by skin and eyelids. The air hit his exposed teeth and sensitive muscle and sinew. He took a ragged breath and threads of pain lanced through him. He was ugly again. He could feel it. But she’d want him now. She would.

Her face was unchanged, impassive. 

They exchanged a few words but her tone was cool. She didn’t hate him, far from it. But he’d changed. He’d spent so long with Spider-Man, he was becoming like him. He cared about people, not just Spidey but the thousands of nameless citizens of New York. He wanted to protect them, shield them with his body, fight for them every day, just as Spider-Man did. He was finally a proper hero. And heroes don’t date girls like Shiklah.

“Sweetheart, I love you but — I’m not sure I know you anymore. Do  _ you _ know you?”

Wade gave her words the consideration that they deserved. It might have been a match made in Hell, but they’d been good together. And it was true, they were growing apart. The pressure of his failing marriage, and the mask and his growing friendship with Spider-Man, all of it weighed on him. But perhaps that pressure was a cocoon and he was going to emerge from it as something better. He already felt better. “Yeah… I do. I’m finally one of the good guys.”

“Demon queens and good guys don’t usually end well, my love. You want me, you know where your mask is.”

His charred nose rolled off the bone and dropped into his palm like a conker. He stood there, peering down at it. His skin was already healing, brand-new pink flesh spreading across the bone. It grew like bacteria, blanketing his head in flawless skin.

He stood there, watching her leave. She walked away from him, her slender form silhouetted by the flames.


End file.
